I stood next to a pregnant woman today. I know her. We're friends. She got pregnant three weeks before I did. She had miscarried this summer and by the beginning of August she was pregnant again. Everyone felt really bad for her, including myself. And when I got pregnant I kept comparing myself to her and I would think, "I won't miscarry." "That won't be me." But it was.
Standing next to her was painful. She had her little baby belly and her cute maternity dress. I said hi to her but didn't ask her how she was doing. I hope she didn't think I was being rude. I think we both felt a little awkward, her for being pregnant and me for being empty... Neither of us knew what to say. She did her business and I did mine. When she was done she left.
People in the room seemed awkward too. We all know each other. Everyone knew she was pregnant and I was not. No one said anything to her about her pregnancy.
I kept watching her. I hope I was doing it discreetly, but I probably wasn't. I watched her lean over the table. The table pushed her dress tight against the bottom of her stomach, stretching the fabric over her baby bump. She stood up on her toes and her tummy pooched out. I saw her rub her stomach once.
It may sound mean of me, but I was relieved when she left.
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