Moving Forward

Two weeks. There was no heartbeat on Thursday. By the following Monday I knew two weeks was to long. 

If you have a dead baby in your body don't let it sit there for two weeks. Maybe that's just me.

I called my doctor. "I need a D&C." 

When they told us Thursday the baby would have to come out naturally or surgically I had never heard of a D and C. When the doctor asked, "Do you want a D&C," I automatically said no. I didn't even know what it was. I didn't ask a single question about it. I had to google it later, after the fair, when I realized two weeks was too long. I had asked my husband what was that D thing the doctor was talking about and he said he wasn't listening to that part either. 

Turns out a D&C is like an abortion. When I called the doctor and asked for one the nurse said they don't do them. Excuse me? 

"We have to refer you to a surgeon."

"How long will that take?"

"I'll get the process started and call you back."

"Okay." No. Not okay. Now that the decision was made I wanted one now. 

I reported the news to my husband. "Why don't you call another doctor," he said.

"Can you even do that," I asked, "can we just call another doctor and say I want...this thing done?" He shrugged. He had never done this before either.

I googled again. D&C, Surgeon, Local. I made the phone call. It was Columbus Day and our office was hosting a character building session for the employees. The word of the day was "character," and the guy doing the seminar who looked a lot like Joe Biden defined character as, and I paraphrase, the way a person reacts to a situation regardless of the circumstances.

When I called the surgeon I found on google the nurse who answered the phone reacted with what our Mr. Biden would have deemed, "with character."

"You're how far along?" She asked when I sobbed into the phone about a D&C.

"I'm 11 weeks now, I was 10 weeks when we found out."

"How far along did the baby measure?"
"10 weeks."

"Can you come in on Wednesday?" Of course I could.

I did better than my doctor. I got myself a date for a D&C that Friday before his office made their first referral. Despite a situation that seemed out of my control I think that I too, reacted with character. We were moving forward.